How do I prepare myself for stress?

Dear EQuipped Leaders,

How are you? What is your current level of stress?

Today I would love to spend some time together checking in with our stress and practicing some exercises to build our resilience to stress.

Before we jump in, what do you believe about stress? If you only have negative associations with stress, I encourage you to take a moment to read this post about how our beliefs about stress impact our ability to use it or be overwhelmed by it.

In short, stress is like fuel. You can put it in your car and drive across the country, or you can pour it on top of your car and light it on fire. Your ability to harness the power of stress determines whether you use it productively or destructively.

One thing that can help is taking some time beforehand to anticipate, redirect energy, and assert yourself in preparation for stressful seasons/events. For example, the start of the school year when everyone is still fresh and not driving each other crazy yet, is a great time to anticipate more stressful months like October when school-year tensions start to ramp up.

When we train teachers, we offer this framework for thinking about our internal landscape in relation to stress:

My personality = the Climate

My emotions = the Weather

My stress = the Storms

Prepping for the stress makes us more resilient to life’s inevitable storms.

So let’s do this together! I did this exercise to prepare for having and caring for a newborn. You can see my responses below if you’d like to use it as an example.

Anticipate: I know _____________ will be challenging. Therefore, I will ________________________.

Redirect the Energy: I will physically redirect my energy by ______________. And I will do that by ______________.

I will emotionally redirect my energy by _____________. And I will do that by ______________.

Assert Yourself Appropriately: I will assert myself appropriately by setting boundaries in the following relationships __________________ by _______________.

I will assert myself appropriately by setting boundaries with my vocation by ______________.

My Storm Prep Example:

Anticipate: I know delivering and caring for a newborn will be challenging. Therefore, I will lovingly find time to give myself space to struggle and heal. I will remind myself that I don’t have to be perfect. My daughter needs me to be present with her, not perfect for her.

Redirect the Energy: I will physically redirect my energy by maintaining my own care. And I will do that by practicing yoga each evening (even if only for a few minutes), walking, and scheduling face mask treat nights.

I will emotionally redirect my energy by remembering to fill up my own emotional tank. And I will do that by scheduling visits and phone dates with friends and family and by finding a show that my husband and I can snuggle and watch together.

I will assert myself appropriately by setting boundaries in the following relationships:

Myself: by remembering that I still have needs whether I take the time to meet them or not. No one will benefit from me burning myself out, so I need to ask for help when I need it and accept it when it's offered.

My husband: by finding ways to connect and nurture our relationship while also keeping realistic expectations about the demands of this unique time of life. Finding ways to support him to keep doing the things that make him feel alive and assert myself by asking him to do the same for me.

My Dream Team: by being honest about what I need and asking my dream team kindly for their help.

I will assert myself appropriately by setting boundaries with my vocation by setting realistic deadlines before and after delivery, so I can continue to contribute to and be fueled by the work I love without committing to more than I can handle during this unique period.

Writing this out actually made me feel a lot better. I had done so much to prepare for the physical logistics of this time professionally and personally, but I hadn’t yet prepared my mindset by thinking through the specifics. It felt good to take the time to prep my inside world to meet the demands that are coming my way.

Where does this land for you today?

How do you feel after preparing yourself for a stress storm?
Do you think your students would benefit from doing this with you to prepare for the stress in their life and see how you, a trusted adult, preps for stress?

Better EQuipped Together, Elizabeth elizabeth@appliedeqgroup.com

Elizabeth graduated with a B.A. and M.A. in English from the University of Central Arkansas. She taught English for a decade and got to read and write alongside kids in 7th, 8th, 10th, 11th, and 12th grade. The Applied EQ Group played an important role in her own personal EQ Intervention, and she is grateful to be able to spread the love and EQuip, empower, and encourage others. :)

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